With all the dates I’ve been going on so far this year, and some recent to-my-face labelling with likely more behind my back, it’s gotten me thinking. — “When did it become okay to call an older woman a “Cougar”? At what age did I have to turn, to seemingly become very desirable to younger men?- Much younger men! Men that are pretty much boys and I am old enough to be their mother!” Okay, there are movies about this (think The Graduate), but why call women Cougars? This insinuates older women are preying on and chasing young guys, however, in my experience, it’s actually the other way around.
As I stated in my debut post Are You My Mr. Right?, the age of men I’m interested in hasn’t changed over the years. Nor has my taste in music, my love of traveling and not wanting to settle down, or not wanting to have children. My question to you then is- “Who are you to judge me on what I like, who I spend my time with, and subsequently call me names?” Well, this ain’t primary school no more! “Sticks & Stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me.” If you were one of the three year olds I teach, and did some name calling, I’d say to you “Not nice!”. Also, if I remember correctly, wasn’t it usually the ones that were jealous of someone or what they had, that called those people names?
“Why can’t I aspire to continue to have men in my life that remind me of my twenty year old first love? — Who just happened to have a body like a god.”
Anyways, if it makes some of you feel better to call me a Cougar, than so be it. In fact, I’m going to own that label right now! Yes, I do like and am attracted to men younger than me. Yes, I have dated men younger than me. Yes, I have had sex with men younger than me- a lot younger than me! Oh, you’re damn right I’m high-fiving myself right now! Excluding when I was the self-described “Bachelorette” a few months ago, I’m not actually sure when it was that I last dated or had sex with a guy my own age or older.
What I want to know is- why would you ever deny yourself that young, hot-as-fuck guy with a six-pack chasing you, when you are single like I am??!! I’m sure as hell not going to. Why can’t I aspire to continue to have men in my life that remind me of my twenty year old first love? — Who just happened to have a body like a god? —— Just a wee bit nostalgic there for a moment. My Tinder age-range might start fifteen years younger than me, but I’m certainly not going to complain when, by dropping down even only a few years, the choices and matches double! In a tourist town with low-season nine months a year, a single girl looking for Mr. Right (or if need be, Mr. Right-Now) could use as many options as she can get!
“I might be a Cougar, but I only bite and scratch if they want me to…”
In saying that, though, and I’m pretty sure you other Cougars out there will attest to this, we are definitely not the ones doing the chasing! In fact, I’d say the younger they are, the more they chase, at least in that twenty-two to twenty-five year old age range- or so I’ve noticed. Hmm, let me think about it. — Hot, fit, twenty-five year old man begging to meet. Sounds horrible, said no one ever!
Here’s a couple recent examples. After my stint as the “Bachelorette” (you can read those previous two posts in the archives below), I matched with a twenty-five year old on Tinder. One of his first messages said “I hope you don’t mind younger guys?” Now, would I be matching with him if I did? He messaged me constantly asking when we could meet. When we finally did, he admitted he bragged to his travel buddies he was meeting an “older woman”, but was also worried I would stand him up. If you live in Siem Reap, you may have even seen him being a great sport wearing my clothes at a local Drag Bingo fundraiser. —
Then there was the twenty-two year old who said he only went on dates or dated “older, experienced women”. He also messaged repeatedly asking when we could meet. He must have said the right things, because we met for drinks, and at the end of the night, he grabbed me and kissed me! Now that was a game changer! Who doesn’t find a confident, dominant man attractive, even if he’s only twenty-two??!! Of course, this is only my opinion. If you’re still concerned about the well-being of all these young men, then you better Lock up your sons! — There’s a Cougar on the loose!
Disclaimer: No twenty-two to twenty-five year olds were maimed on any dates. I might be a Cougar, but I only bite and scratch if they want me to…
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Are You My Mr. Right? 